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הלו לכולם. :)
שמי אשלי... אני בת 18 וחצי ואני גרה בניו יורק.
אני סוג של אימו לשעבר. כפי שכבר ראיתם...
באתי לכתוב כאן בשביל לפרוק.. יש לי חיים..קצת מתוסבכים אם אפשר להגיד את זה ככה.
יש לי חבר (בן זוג/ ארוס. תקראו לזה איך שתרצו) מושלם,
וחברה הכי טובה שתומכת בי.
אך למרות כל הדברים היפים האלה.. גם לי יש קצת בעיות.
שצצות להן לרגע, ורגע לאחר מכן נעלמות.
לפעמים הרגעים הללו ארוכים,
ולפעמים לא.
אז..קריאה נעימה. :)

זה האימייל שלי- emolife995@gmail.com לשאלות, בקשות או כל דבר אחר.. אתם מוזמנים לפנות אליי :)
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Ghost Dogדניאלlife is sweetכוכב באפלהcosmicBFFgirl
LonelyGirlחולמתturn wildTigerLily
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.one day

10/10/2014 02:26
Emo Life
 .a long long time has been past since i worte my last post here
.and lots of things have been happening to me too
  ".every day in this time, i was thinking to myself: "come on ashley, go and write something
but everytime i got into this writing post page i have lost all my words and my mind became
.dark. but now... when i'm thinking about it again... i have a lot to say. so just... let's do it

.first of all, i will start with the biggest thing in my life right now. Alex
.everything with him at this time has intensified
.our relationship
.our engagement
.our love
.our relationship is storng and unbreakable more than ever
me. Alex the girl and my dad's girlfriend has been decided about an engagement party that is
.gonna be held a week after Christmas
.and i love him and in love with like i have never was. so does he
.i'm just so happy to have him
sometimes he's pushing me a little bit harder. but when i'm saying that i cant take it he says
.sorry and we're keep on going
as example... something like a month ago he told me to stop taking the pills that keep me
.save for getting pregnant. i was wondering why, so i asked him why
and i will never forget his words: "why? because i want a child Ashely. thats why. I want
".something that will be ours from all the aspects
even though i'm very scared of getting pregnant... and i don't even know why. he kinda
.convised me there that he's right. and we really do need something that will reall be ours
:).well... i'm not saying that i'm pregnant, but i cannot say that we're not working on it

.second of all... i finally met again my old sister
.if you do not remember, i have two sisters. one is younger and the other one i older than me
the thirteen's sister is living with us. after our "mother" decided that she doesn't wanna be in touch with anyone of us. even though that Eden (the young sister) isn't eighteen. which in one point made me so angry. because she's her fucking daugther, she can't avoid her just because she hates my dad or she hates all of us. but in another point it made me such a relief because i am not sending my young sister to live with a monster. alone. for a year. without me who's keeping her save
.but i'll go back to my old sister
.her name is Mayan. she's 25 and since she was twenty i have not seen her
but one day. two weeks ago. when i came back from alex' house i saw her sitting on the couch in my house and talking to my dad. next to them was sitting a guy that looked in her age. when i looked at him for a long time i realized that he's the guy she ran away with
 .it was a hugh shock for me
when she saw me. at first, she said hello and told me how pretty i am... and that i grewn up to be a great and beautiful lady
.and i could say the same to her
my big sister is so pretty. she got the blond hair and green eyes from my dad. she's thin and tall and... shes just beautiful. and i guess she has always been my sister
we had a long conversation with each other. we just set alone in my room and talked about everything we missed in these years
she told that she left our house because some weeks before she had a real big fight with our mother about many things that it's better for me not to know about them. she said that half from the idea of leaving the house belongs to our mother. so she left without saying anything
.she told she left with her boyfriend (that now is her husband) to another city in Israel
.but she didnt tell anyone. she just hid from us
after i told her what have been happening with me, and after some tears from her side... i hugged her and i felt so good to see her again
.it was like closing a circle

"and the last thing... i've finally dealt with my "mother
as you all know... my last post is about her, calling me in the morning and saying that she wants me to forgive her about all she has done. and i didnt know what to do
.but after something like a week after, she called again and asked what i've decided
.then, i didn't mind anymore. i just told her what i really think about her
i was honest. i told her that i think she is a monster. she doesn't deserve none of us. she never really deserved my dad and it was for all his good to leave her. i told her that i hate her and i'll never stop. i told her that she will never be loved and she'll die as a lonely woman. i knew i could just saying no and hung up. but i wanted to be brave and face my fear
.i wanted to face her. so i got the courge and did it
".she was speechless, she was like "well... if that's what you think. i won't try to stop you
.and then she hunged up
.i felt free, brave, smart. i felt anything
...it was amazing

.so anyways... that all i wanted to tell
i'm not saying that i came back to the blog... i'm just updating something for the people who ask themselves where have i been all this time
:) .i cannot say that i didn't miss you guys
.thanks for reading, i'm waiting for the comments 
(by the way - it'll be nice and help me if you'll write them in English)
 3> love you guys


10/10/2014 12:22
oh my god, Ashley! u werent here like... a half year wow
i actually really missed u :)
im so so happy to hear about all that, you just made me smile.
i wish u happines and every good thing in any where you go.
3>
Emo Life
01/01/2015 23:34
thank you Liany, love ya ;)
11/10/2014 23:10
I'm so happy for u <3
and i missed u..
Emo Life
01/01/2015 23:34
thanks Aqua, Ive missed you too ♡
girl
18/10/2014 11:10
Ashley I missed you so much and sometimes I found myself sitting and wondering about you and Alex, you and your mother..i told myself that if you not posting anything then something happened and you probably just busy making arrangements .. so I'm glad that you finally wrote something and I'm really really really really happy for you and Alex :)
Emo Life
01/01/2015 23:35
thanks :)
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